Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Weekend Don't, Plus 3 Do's

I'm out this weekend and couldn't help but pull out the camera AGAIN. I was reminded by my boyfriend and friend that "it's not about the face, it's about the fashion". Could this be true???? I guess so unless it IS about the face. Anyway...you'll understand what I mean by the end of this post.

Here we go...

I'm FLABBERGASTED!!! I'm APPALLED!!! I'm DISGUSTED!!! I've said before, I do not have a problem with plus-size girls. I have seen soooo many beautiful girls that can pull their look together perfectly. Size means nothing when it comes to perfect fashion sense. That said, this chick is INSANE!!! I don't even know what else to say...the photo speaks for itself! I mean...at least she wore underwear...I think?

Trying to keep warm? There is NO excuse for this! The jacket is cute, and would probably work if she wasn't wearing that hideous dress! I'm really only okay with wearing a dress over jeans in the summertime AND there are sooooo many guidelines to making it look okay. Anyway, this is just a major DON'T! Even the bag is a don't all the way around. I'm sorry blondie, but you look like crap. Actually, that outfit should be apologizing to us. Ugh!!!

I'm all about trends, and if I were thin enough, you'd see me in a jersey jumper. Granted this gal IS thin enough, but I don't think SHE realized that. First off she bought this one size too big, it's hanging off the tiny bit of ass she has and dragging all over the ground! I can't tell what kind of shoes she's wearing, but she could have at least threw on a small heel to save her a little shame. P.S. that bag is way too heavy (and ugly) for this look.

I kinda feel bad about this...she does have an injured foot, and even clumsy people are allowed to go out for a drink, so we'll stay away from the ugly boot. Whatever her look may be...Bohemian, Hippy Chic, Grandma's Closet...it's bad! She's a large busted big girl...that is WAY too much fabric for her to be wearing. No one should EVER wear skirts like that again. NEVER!!! From what I can tell of the top, it could be cute with a pair of jeans. She probably can't wear jeans right now (the injury), so a different dress would have been the best solution...and NOT with sneakers please!!!

I can see that the look was thought out, it just was put together with the wrong pieces. From what I can see...the tank is too loose, the vest is too small. the jeans too baggy, and the boots hit mid-calf and make her legs look cut off. I'll give her an "E" (for effort), even though her attempt at a clutch was actually a wallet. Oh well! I want to take the opportunity to talk a little about boots and the perfect height to wear. I personally have short legs and a long torso. I base my decisions on what is going to make me look thinnest and tallest. Wearing boots that stop mid-calf is completely wrong! It cuts the view of your leg at a weird place and makes one look stumpy. It is very rare that I would approve of this length. Play it safe, stick with a bootie or something right below the knee. Also if you are short, wearing over the knee boots is a trend you should pass up, unless you wear them with a high heel. Next photo...

What is going on here? So many girls have their heart in the right place when it comes to fashion, but unfortunately, that just isn't enough. She's wearing True Religion and these jeans don't always have to be slim or skinny, but I can tell that these loose fitting jeans are the wrong size. Look at the way they hang off her ass, she needs a smaller size. The keys...get a bag! No girl that is trying to dress up a bit should EVER wear her keys on a belt loop. That just screams "dyke". Her top is cute, I like the low back, but that vest has got to go!!! I have nothing against this new faux furry vest look that's out and about, but her vest doesn't work and it's too big! You can tell by how huge the armholes are and the fact that we can see her back. Maybe it was a friends, but I doubt it.

WHAT about THIS dude??? I know, belieeeeve me, I KNOW it's difficult for guys to find good clothing these days (I have an extremely picky boyfriend), and I KNOW it's even harder for a big man to find good fashion...but this dude looks like he's wearing a Hefty bag!!! Man...I feel bad about this, but I'm just saying what all of you are thinking. Don't shoot the messenger. I'm just here to help and to keep others from making the same mistakes.

HAPPY NEWS...cute shit!!!

These are soooo fucking cute! And I swear this isn't a picture of me, cuz we all know I'm the fabulous shoe queen about town. I was impressed and a little giddy to see cute shoes on someone else. These would be gorgeous in patent...I think I'm going to look for a pair (since I don't have enough patent platforms..."they all look different!!!!")

I dunno if these two are a couple, never-the-less they look super cute. I love the girls jacket and booties. The guy looks really cute...maybe I'm bias, cuz he is dressed like my boyfriend does. (What with me mentioning my bf 3X in this blog???? I'm on my period...that must be why he's on my mind. Tee Hee!!!)

Lastly I saw this girl and I was like, "Damn, I was gonna buy that dress", it's super cute. I personally would have cut off the belt loops (they make it look tacky and cheap) and wore a different belt (this one comes with the dress). Anyway, this fits her perfectly, her jewelry is cute, and her hair was in a messy side bun...it was well put up. Good job little gal from St. Louis! (1st paragraph hint...ahem).


  1. Great blog, You had me cracking up the whole time, as a matter of fact I almost fell out of my seat, when you said, what I was thinking about the keys on the belt loops, so Dyke-y LOL keep emh coming.

  2. and you talk about tacky? talk about going back on your words.First you talk shit about girls who wear cheap heels and about how they're not vintage but yet you want these new modern platform heels? YOU really are the vintage rockabilly queen huh....shame, shoot yourself.

  3. AHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHH!!!!! L.M.A.O that hefty bag comment was hella funny ahahaha